Blog Posts

Ten Years--So Different, Yet Still the Same

4/22/2017

Ten years.
One hundred twenty months.
Five hundred twenty weeks.
Three thousand, six hundred and fifty days.

That is how much time has passed since we last saw your smiling face, heard your voice and laughter, felt the warmth of your hugs or endured any of your corny jokes.

A lot has changed in ten years. Our country has seen two new presidents. The Chicago Cubs won the 2016 World Series after a 108-year drought! (The Detroit Lions still have not had any great seasons.) In most homes, landlines are pretty much a distant memory since most everyone owns a cell phone now. We can use our cell phones for texting, emailing, social-media and even do our banking on them! Where people used to wear a watch on their left wrist, we can now choose to wear something called a “Fitbit”—it helps us monitor our heartrate, workouts, calorie intake/burn. Doctors are now diagnosing on-line those patients with minor problem. The patients with major issues still have the struggle of sitting in the actual waiting room for who knows how long. Health insurance has not changed. In fact, it may be worse. Either way, it still involves a bunch of red tape and jumping through hoops.

Our family has grown. You have a brother-in-law and some sisters-in-law. You even have nieces and nephews now! Your oldest nephew carries your name, and at times, looks quite a bit like you. Some family members have passed away, but you already know about them since they are with you now. We have lost pets and we have added new ones. I am sure all of us have different vehicles now, too. Your dad still has the Jeep, though, and still only brings it out for “special occasions.” (Like when he wants to play in the yard or drive out to the woods and try to get it stuck in the field—just to prove he can wench it out!)

So much has changed over the last ten years, David. Then again, some things have remained the same. We miss you just as much today as we did when you first left us. You are still on our minds daily. We still carry the hurt and disbelief of losing you. There is a hole in our hearts that we know will never mend…we would not expect it to be. We still take each day as it comes, putting one foot in front the other to move forward because we know that’s what you would want us to do. The biggest thing that has not changed is the love we have in our hearts for you. Whether it was as a son, a grandson, a brother, a nephew, a cousin or a friend, we were all so very blessed to have you in our lives. In addition, we are still very blessed to have all the wonderful memories you left with us.

Ten years
One hundred twenty months.
Five hundred twenty weeks.
Three thousand, six hundred and fifty days.

This amount of time may have given and taken many things, but no amount of time will ever surpass the pain of losing you, the joy of having known you and the honor of having you in our hearts each day.

We love you David Mair!

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Little Baby (In loving memory of Caine)

3/20/2017

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Little Baby
(In loving memory of Caine)

The day you came into our lives
The world became a better place.
We couldn’t help but fall in love
With your eyes, your smile, your tiny face.

You touched our lives, you rocked our world
And gave to us such happy days.
We saw your smile and heard your laugh
And delighted in your loving ways.

We treasure every moment spent with you
Each day we got to see you grow.
Your life with us was much too short
But were blessed so much, we know.

We love you precious little one
Forever in our hearts you’ll be.
God has you wrapped in His arms now
So little baby, rest in peace.

~Ruth McDonald Mair~
3-19-17

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Voting Party: Save the Date--and Our Country

9/29/2016

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I do not normally make my political views known openly, and this will be no exception. So if you are reading this to see if I support Hillary Clinton or detest Donald Trump, read no further…you will not find that information here. In fact, as
I write this today, I am still undecided as to whom I will cast my ballot for.

If most of you are like me, you are sick and tired of the “slamming” between the presidential candidates we have in front of us. I am tired of hearing that Hillary lied about one thing or another. I am tired of hearing that Donald Trump has the personality of a rock. I’m tired of hearing each of them trying to degrade the other. By doing so, neither is winning any points in my book.

From what I have seen and heard, neither Hillary nor Donald has been campaigning for the JOB. They have been campaigning to deface their opponent and convince the majority to despise the other. Neither has been very direct in regards to what they WILL do if they are elected. They have each, however, been very clear as to what the other HAS DONE that is so corrupt that they should not be voted in as president. I am not saying that a person’s past should not play a factor in whether they become our next president, but I think that their ideas for the future of our country should carry a great deal of weight in our decision. And I do not think we should believe everything either of them says about the other.

I am going to sit down and do some major research on each of our presidential candidates to learn more than what I already know. I want to know what each of them plans to actually attempt to accomplish if he or she is voted into office. I need to know that I will still have a retirement account when I am ready to use that. I need to know that my children will all be able to hold on to their jobs to support their families. I need to know that my grandchildren will be safe when they go off to school each day. I need to know that our next president will honor and defend our constitution, that they will honor and support their country, and that they will honor and support the citizens of the United States of America—the very people they are working for. Maybe I am blind or just complete politically illiterate, but I’ve not heard these types of statements from either of them.

So, as the date draws closer for our country to decide who our next president will be, I urge each of you to research the two candidates. Maybe you already have, and kudos to you! I guess what I am really asking here is that you don’t go to the polls and vote for Hillary “because she’s a woman” or “because she is a Democrat.” Please don’t vote for Donald “because he’s a Republican” or “because he’s a business man.” Don’t discard the possibility of Trump becoming our president “because he’s a hothead” or Clinton “because she’s a liar.” And please don’t be one who stays uninformed and does not vote at all because you “don’t like either candidate.” There is always a third-party or a write-in option. Casting a vote for SOMEONE is far better than remaining silent.

The invitations to our “voting party” have been sent. Save the date and plan to attend. Our future, our children’s future and our grandchildren’s future depends on it.

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Glow Where You Are Planted

9/7/2016

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Have you ever wondered why you are where you are today? I have. I often wonder why, when God already knows that I don’t like cold weather, He allowed me to end up being a Kentucky transplant living in Michigan. What I intended to be a short summertime visit has turned into a 32-year stay! Just as a side note, in my humble opinion, the Michigan winters do not get easier to deal with and I do dread it more with each passing year!

I was driving down the road the other day and saw a tree that had a few leaves that were already changing from summertime green to autumn red and orange. While I will admit that autumn is a beautiful season, the first week of September is way too early for my eyes to behold those colors. The sight of that tree and its changing leaves triggered my most recent round of inquisitiveness.

I asked myself “Why am I in Michigan?” No response came.

Then I asked God, “Why am I in Michigan?” The answer I got did not arrive in the form of a lightning bolt hitting the ground in front of me, nor was it a great epiphany of any sort. It was just very soft and subtle, asking me to compare myself to the tree with the changing leaves. Compare myself to a tree?!?! Crazy, right? Not really. I tried it and here is what I came up with.

The tree has roots buried deep in the ground, and there is very little that can sever those roots. Hmmm…I have roots. I have family and friends that I love and care about. It would take an eternity to sever those ties.

The tree has taken years to mature and grow into the solid configuration it has become. I myself have done a lot of growing over the years. I have made mistakes and I have learned from them. I have become a strong, solid and confident individual.

That old tree has provided shelter and shade with its outstretched branches, yet has probably lost a few branches to the wind over the years. Guess what? I raised a family. I provided them a shelter, food, guidance and unconditional love over the years. Sure, I had a few broken moments in time. Times when my kids weren’t perfect angels, and pushed me to my limits; times when my husband and I have disagreed and argued. But I survived all of that, and so did they. I am certain there will be more of those broken moments in my future, but again, I will survive.

The last comparison I thought of is the one that stands out most for me. The tree isn’t fighting to keep the green leaves. It will gracefully let go and let those red, orange and yellow leaves appear. With all those colors, the tree seems to glow where it was planted. It was then that I realized that I need to take what I have learned in life and share it with others…let them see the hope that is there and the beauty that will be. I am here to glow where I have been planted.

Glow where you are planted. It can only make this world more beautiful.

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What Has a Soldier Ever Done?

5/27/2016

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I realize that not everyone shares the same views or beliefs of what our United States military is, does and stands for. In fact, some people may pose the question, “What has a soldier ever done for me?” With the Memorial Day holiday upon us, I wanted to write something to help bring to light just a few examples of what our soldiers have done for us. So here's hoping that the next time you hear someone ask what a soldier has ever done for them, you will share this with them.

What Has a Soldier Ever Done?
A soldier endured six to twelve weeks of constant drilling from sunup to sundown, being yelled at, calisthenics at all hours of the day and night, living in closed, tight quarters with dozens of other soldiers, knowing that if one of them makes a mistake, they will all pay. Six to twelve weeks of this while we attended school, enjoyed recess, went to college or reported our job.

A soldier left behind his family and friends to go live in a foreign country for only God knows how long while we had picnics with our families, partied with our friends or rocked our babies to sleep each night.

A soldier lived in a tent or a foxhole in the desert for months on end while we sat in our air conditioned homes and offices.

A soldier ate military rations while we enjoyed home-cooked meals, dining out in fancy restaurants and grilling on the weekends.

A soldier wore full military gear seven days a week while we got to dress up for a night out or wear our favorite jeans and t-shirt.

A soldier fought against the enemy, dodging bullets, bombs, avoiding landmines and roadside IED’s while we argued with our parents about curfew, or sat in a board room discussing the profits and/or losses from last quarter.

A soldier marched wearing heavy military-issued boots while we ran our 5K’s wearing our Nike’s or went to the beach wearing our flip flops.

A soldier attended a church service held in a tent or barracks and prayed that he would make it home to see his family again while we attended church in a fancy building and passed the collection plate to help those less fortunate.

A soldier lost an arm or leg or eye, while we swam, hiked or danced.

A soldier flew home beside several of his comrades…all of them in a wooden box draped with the American flag. These soldiers gave their lives so that we may continue to live ours.

~Ruth McDonald Mair~
5-27-16

God bless our all of our soldiers, but especially those who gave the ultimate sacrifice.

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Make the Time...It Matters to Someone

4/12/2016

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I Asked

I asked my friend to meet for lunch
So we could exchange news
She had plans she couldn’t change
But soon we’d visit, we were overdue

I asked my sister for some time
One day a while ago
She said she had some things to do
When she was free, she’d let me know

I asked my brother to meet up
Just to spend a day
He said his schedule was all full
He’d reach out soon, he’d find a way

I asked my son to watch a movie
I thought we both might like
He had a game and date that night
But he’d call soon, and we’d grab a bite

I asked my husband to go out
And have some time for us
He said he had to tend the yard
We’d find some time, there was no rush

I asked my Lord to save a place
For me in Heaven’s land
He told me, “It’s all been tended to.
I’m waiting for you, come take my hand.”

~Ruth McDonald Mair~
4-12-16

Thank you for stopping by my site. If you enjoyed this, please share it with a friend or two. If you would like to be notified when this site is updated, send an email to ruthswords@yahoo.com, with "subscribe" as the subject line and include your email address in the body. Your email will be used only for these notices and will not be given out. Have a blessed day! ~Ruth~

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An Open Letter to the Mother of My Future Daughter-in-Law

2/1/2016

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Dear mother of my future daughter-in-law,

As I sit in my living room writing this letter to you tonight, I realize how connected you and I are because of the relationship between your daughter and my son. I am thankful for that connection, and I am thankful for your friendship.

As mothers, you and I dedicated our lives to these two children. We spent countless hours with them as babies, holding them in our arms, nurturing them and loving them, kissing scrapes and cuts, applying first-aid ointment and band aids. We lived through the first immunizations, the first day of school, driver’s training, the first date, the first broken curfew. We attended school programs, parent-teacher conferences, field trips, and graduations. We have done our absolute best to get these two children to where they are today…two adults ready to commit the rest of their lives to each other.

As we prepare for our children’s wedding day, I want to thank you for raising such a beautiful, thoughtful and special young lady. When I see her look at my son, I see the love in her eyes and the devotion she has for him. I see her eyes sparkle and that beautiful smile on her face. I can feel her love for my son. She has learned the importance of letting these emotions show because she was blessed with you as a role model.

I want you to know that even though I feel your daughter has already been a part of my family for some time, I am looking forward to the day she will become a wife to my son….the day she will become more than just my daughter-in-law. She will become my daughter. I want to thank you for sharing her with me. You will always and forever be her mother, her confidante, and first friend. I will never try to impede the close-knit relationship she has forged with you over the years. Please be assured, however, that I will always be there for her in whatever capacity she needs me. I will support her and cheer her on, hold and comfort her, and love her unconditionally for all the remaining days of my life.

I look forward to the beautiful day she walks down the aisle, takes my son’s hand in hers and they pledge their eternal love to each other.

Sincerely,
The mother of your future son-in-law

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A 101 Year Old Legacy

1/13/2016

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Miss Lillie Gladys Holcomb March 2, 1914 - January 11, 2016

Can you imagine being given 101 years on this earth to live, learn, love and make a huge impact on others?

I know a woman who had exactly that. Her name was Miss Lillie Gladys Holcomb. Everyone always called her “Miss Gladys.”

I first met Miss Gladys when my family moved to a small town in Georgia when I was 8 years old. She was the elementary school principal. Though I may be wrong, I don’t think it was common for a woman to be a school principal in the 1970’s. That alone should have been my first clue at what an extraordinary woman Miss Gladys was. In the years I attended her school, I never once heard her raise her voice, never saw her angry or upset, never saw her flustered in any way. Instead, I can remember her smiling and saying “Good morning!” as we would arrive at the school each day. I remember her helping students, praising students, encouraging students and always asking us to “READ!” If there had ever been a prerequisite class to become a school principal, it could have been called “Principal Training 101” she would have been the perfect person to teach it! Miss Gladys understood kids and she took the time to let us know she genuinely cared.

Miss Gladys was also a member of the church my family attended. I remember her welcoming us to our very first service and telling my family that if we, as new comers to the community, needed any advice on where to shop for groceries, barber and/or beauty shops, banks, clothing stores, dentist, doctors…anything at all, she was there to help. Miss Gladys was a member of that church for over 80 years, so I know my family was not the only one she welcomed with such open arms! She was just that way.

I can remember going Christmas caroling to her house each year. She lived in a big house with her sister. They would always stand in the door and listen to us sing the carols and when we were finished, they would invite us into their home and serve THE best cookies and hot tea ever! They would sit with us and talk and tell stories and always made sure we knew we always welcome back at any time, not just at Christmas.

I had the opportunity and great pleasure to visit with Miss Gladys at her nursing home just last spring when I made a visit back to that small town in Georgia. I had been away for almost 40 years and that amazing woman remembered me! She did not recognize me by sight, but once I told her my name she knew exactly who I was and she remembered my parents as well. My friend and I got a good chuckle when at one point during our visit Miss Gladys looked at us and said, “You know, I am 120 years old!” We assured her she was NOT 120 and I recall her smiling and saying she was ready to go to Heaven. I will treasure that visit with Miss Gladys for the rest of my life.

Although I lived in that small town only five short years, the impact Miss Holcomb had on me has been with me all these years. I may not have been aware of it on a conscious level, but now reflecting back, I can see it. Miss Gladys was a one-of-a-kind woman and I am so thankful that she and I crossed paths. From reading posts on social media over the last day or so, I can tell she was a major influence in many, many lives.

Miss Gladys is no longer on this earth with us, but we can be certain her legacy of love and compassion will live on in our hearts, memories and best of all in our actions as we pay forward in her honor.

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Turning My Back in 2016

1/1/2016

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2015 has closed its doors and we have stepped into 2016, the start of a brand new year. No one knows exactly what this year will bring, although we all have hopes and dreams of what will be. Some are planning weddings and honeymoons while others are trying to adjust to living alone once again. Some are preparing for the arrival of a newborn while others are figuring out the best move for their elderly loved one who can no longer care for themselves. Some are preparing to graduate college and begin a new and exciting career while others are planning to retire from many years of service and dedication.

In 2016 I am going to simply turn my back.

I will turn my back to the past, no longer regretting mistakes I have made, moving forward with the lessons I have learned. I will turn my back to the unkind words of others, speaking only words of kindness. I will turn my back to the negativity of those who wish to bring me down and see me fail, celebrating in the success of others as they better themselves. I will turn my back to the gossip others spread, finding the positive in those being spoken poorly of. I will turn my back on the impatience of others, reaching out a helping hand to those in need. I will turn my back on the road behind me, looking forward to a much better life and more happiness as I put others first in my life. I will turn my back on all things negative, letting a more positive light shine on my face, casting the doubtful and unkind shadows behind me.

This year, will you help build a wall against all the evil and negativity, making the world a more positive place? Will you join me in turning your back in 2016?

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The Lesson Outside My Window

12/18/2015

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Yesterday afternoon I was sitting in my living room admiring the Christmas tree my granddaughter and two youngest sons helped me put up and decorate last weekend. The gold tinsel and the ornaments of red and white seemed to be glowing from the strings of lights. The angel on top of the tree was lit up. As I sat there looking at this beautiful tree standing in front of my French doors, I saw a truck driving by slowly on the road in front of my house. It was quite loud, like the exhaust may have been ready to give out. Something about this truck made me stand up and go to the window. As I looked out, I saw that the driver had pulled off to the side of the road just down from my house. An older man with quite the scruffy beard and wearing an old, tattered coat emerged. He had neither a hat nor gloves on. I watched as the man shuffled to the back of his truck and pulled out a clear milk jug which appeared to contain water. He slowly made his way to the front of the truck and struggled to lift the hood. I could see him fiddling with something under the hood and then he poured the liquid from the clear jug into what I presumed was his radiator. He tossed the empty jug back into his truck, slowly climbed back into the driver’s seat and was on his way once again.

As the man drove away, my heart was heavy for him. I said a prayer that he would arrive safely to where he was going and that he would have a warm house and a good home-cooked meal waiting for him. Then I started thinking of all the people outside of my windows. How many of them don’t have a home or warm clothes or food? How many of them need a job? How many of them might have a terminally ill family member and though they know their days together are limited, they are thankful for every minute they have left? How many of them won’t have a Christmas tree full of ornaments and lights, let alone any gifts to put under such a tree? How many of them struggle just to make it through to the next day?

I think God sent that man by my house yesterday for a reason. To make me realize that no matter what battles I may be dealing with, however bad I think things may be, and no matter what my financial situation may be, there are others out there who would love to be in my place.

Let’s make Christmas a little different this year. Let’s all take a little extra time opening our gifts, not just tearing into them and throwing the paper wherever it may land. Let’s all put a little more emphasis on being thankful for the things we have received. Let’s all enjoy our family time a little more, sharing more hugs. And let’s all remember there really is a world outside our windows that we can all learn from.

I want to wish each of you a very Merry Christmas and may you be blessed with a happy and healthy year in 2016!

God bless you!